The
Greatest Lesson you can ever Learn
by Destin Lucas
" The expense of spirit in a waste of shame
is lust in action "
William
Shakespeare
There is a story told about a man, would may or may
not have lived in this world. It is a story so amazing
and filled with such hope that even the imagination
wills to take flight and desire for the glimmer of
whether it be real or not,… But this truth I leave
for you to judge, …
Richard J Sterling, was one of the wealthiest men in
South Africa. He lived on an exclusive vineyard in
Cape Town. Every morning he used to take his new
Porche Carrera for a drive along the beachfront.
Richard didn’t have many friends, the reason being
that he was very choosy. He used to say, that he
wasn’t a racist but a 'classist'. And as such Richard
would only hang around with people of a certain
‘Level’.
Richard had the most interesting childhood, he was
born in a rather poor area in Johannesburg. He went to the local school, and was
often embarrassed by the holes in his school shoes.
Unfortunately his divorced mother couldn’t afford to
buy him new shoes. She actually could hardly afford to
feed him, and many a night Richard went to bed hungry.
As Richard grew up, the pain of poverty would often
bother him. He would constantly promise himself that
when he grew up he would be rich. Never again would he
tolerate poverty and lack. This made Richard driven.
This made him intolerant of any weakness in himself.
Richard would often scream at himself and would force
himself to study for hours and hours every day. He
never had time for fun,… the only important thing
was to succeed at school, so that one day he could be
rich. There was no other goal. Nothing else was
important.
Richard worked really hard at school. He managed to
finish top of his class at least 3 times in his senior
school years. He completed his final year of school as
one of the top students in the country. Naturally
Richard, earned his bursary and the opportunity to
study towards becoming an investment banker.
At university Richard was constantly networking with
the other students. He would also pursue rich people,
trying to interest them in some or other investment
scheme. Sometimes his schemes didn’t work, but
overall, with Richards hard work, he managed to
accumulate a couple of hundred thousand dollars, by
the time he graduated.
Richard further pursued his relentless career by
joining a notable financial institution. While working
there he completed his Certified Financial Analysts Diploma
and his MBA. At 30 Richard was really going somewhere.
Richard celebrated his 31st birthday in a
very special way. He went on a round the world cruise on a luxury
liner; the occasion was, his first $ 1 million. Richard
then decided to set his goals higher. Even though he
was now rich, he still felt insecure. He still felt
that somehow he didn’t have enough. He felt an
overwhelming compulsion to have more, he felt an
uncontrollable lust for money.
So, Richard decided that investment banking actually
wasn’t the thing for him. With his ‘superior’
business insight he could easily outdo his puny
investment banking commissions. Richard got into the
high tech scene. He went into the manufacture of
sophisticated computer networking gear.
In fact he had
such a good development team that within 5 years he
had dominated the worldwide market in his area of specialization. Naturally this wasn’t done by genius
alone, he had a helping hand from his rich investors
and quite a good ‘method’ of eliminating the
competition. Richard was ruthless,…
Time continued and Richard dramatically expanded his
wealth. At 40 he was one of the wealthiest man in
South Africa and decided to retire to Cape Town. He
bought himself a luxury vineyard near Stellenbosch and
started to contemplate the meaning of his life.
But Richard realized one important thing. For all of
his wealth, he simply wasn’t happy. He had no family
(His wife had divorced him, she just couldn’t take
his never-ending lust for wealth), he had never been
able to stay in a relationship since. He also found
that his health was failing, the doctors told him that
all the rich food and free sex were seriously
affecting him. The stress of his many many business
endeavors had taken a further toll on his health and
he was at risk of a heart attack,…
Night after night Richard pondered on the question,
over and over again it he asked,’ Why aren’t I
happy ? ‘ But still no answer came… Richard
managed to stay retired for a whole 2 years before his
lust for money consumed him again.
So, he decided that he needs to solve his problem, in
the same way always had,… make some more money. But,
fortunately for Richard, his prayers were not
unanswered. One day he spoke to someone. Someone
extraordinary. A great sage and a master of true-life
and true happiness,... But the sage was not what you
would expect. The sage came in the form of his younger
sister Cindy.
Now Cindy was a little different to Richard. She had
also grown up in the same terrible poverty, but she
decided to deal with it in a different way. Cindy
decided to find out why, her mother had
ended up in such a desperate situation, and to then
see what she could do differently. Cindy was actually a mediocre student, and by
our modern standards a mediocre achiever, except for
one profound thing, which made her one of the greatest
people of her day.
Cindy had discovered the secret to true and enduring
happiness,… Now Richard knew this. He had always
secretly admired Cindy’s seemingly infinite Joy and
overwhelming zest for life. Cindy would just exude
passion and everything she touched seemed to shine.
Cindy truly was a wonder.
One day after a really tough week, (He only made $ 5
million), Richard was feeling really down and
insecure. He felt that he was loosing his edge and his
continuing health problems weren’t helping matters
either. Richard felt really desperate so he called his sister in Johannesburg and asked her to come and
spend a week at his place. He really needed a
different perspective on things. Richard paid for
Cindy’s air ticket and flew her down to
Stellenbosch.
When Cindy arrived she took one look at Richard and
instantly felt sorry for him. He just wasn’t right
and she knew it. That night Cindy and Richard stayed
up and chatted until dawn. Richard remembered how, when
the two of them were growing up, they used to just sit
and chat; how carefree the world was in those days. He
had forgotten how valuable the smaller things in life
truly are,…
But more importantly Richard learnt something deeply
profound from Cindy. Richard had asked her, how she
managed to be so happy, she wasn’t very rich, though
she did have a good job and a stable career. She had a
fantastic husband and two kids. And everyone who knew
her, loved her. ‘How did she do it ?‘
And the answer will amaze you with its simplicity and
power as it amazed Richard,… the answer was
something Cindy had learnt from one of her school
teachers. Mr. Thomas James. Thomas James was a simple
man who strived to teach his kids the master keys to
success. Born into a prominent family, he had decided
to pursue a teaching career to impart some of the
wisdom of success, into the lives of underprivileged
children. He didn’t believe that anyone was inferior
rather that all people could be great. And what Thomas
taught Cindy was this,… ‘ Love is your POWER ‘.
Cindy repeated the words to Richard, ‘ Love is your
POWER ! ‘. Richard actually didn’t get it. He
said, ‘ What do you mean that Love is my power. I
have power, I am the chairman of one of the most
prominent companies in the world. Over 20 000 people
depend on me for their bread and butter every day.
What do you mean Love is power,… my money brings me
power,… ‘ And as Richard was speaking he suddenly
stopped in mid sentence as he realized,…
All of his life he had believed that he needed to
force himself to do things. He would use fear and lust
to get himself to do things. He would say, 'You can
only have that chocolate when you have gotten a
Distinction for
your test,...'
He had believed that when he has this
‘success’ he would be happy; when in fact the true key
to his happiness, lay not in what he had, but in the
state of his mind.
Cindy said to Richard, ‘The key to happiness is to
let LOVE motivate you’. Richard went silent for a
moment as he pondered this thought. He thought, ‘Let
LOVE motivate me, what do you mean let LOVE motivate
me ?’ Richard kept pondering on this thought over
and over again he pondered until at last in
frustration he asked Cindy, ‘How do I let LOVE
motivate me ?‘
Cindy thought for a moment before she answered with Mr.
Thomas James’s favorite quote. The one he
used to repeat, over and over again, ‘ There are
three types of people in this world. The first two may
appear happy, but can never be. The Third are always
happy even if though things may not be perfect.’ Richard interrupted, ‘And these people are
… ‘. Cindy feeling a little rushed continued, ‘
The first person is someone who is motivated by Fear.
They do everything because they are afraid of what
would happen if they don’t do it.
The second type of person is motivated by Lust, they
do everything out of greed, or self-interest. They
feel that, they will never have enough,… they are always dissatisfied.
But the third type people are the Greatest in the
world. They are the ones we teach our kids about and
they are the history makers, people such as Jesus
& Ghandi.
They are the true world changers. These people are
motivated by LOVE, by genuine care and sensible
compassion. They are the truly wise and the truly
GREAT‘
As Richard heard this, his mind started to spin. He
asked Cindy for a little space and went for a walk on
the beach. About an hour later,… Richard came back
never to be the same again...
In the passing years, Richard truly became great. He
used his wealth to teach people how to LOVE. And
because of his influence they listened. In fact he
taught his entire nation how to LOVE and filled the
world with the greatest beauty of peace and harmony.
Richard created a world we all want to belong to.
One day about 20 years later a little boy named Tim
and his mother, were walking through the largest city
in the land. While little Tim was running around he
saw a stature of a man. He ran up to an elderly lady
who was admiring the statue. He tugged on her coat as
he asked her, ‘Who’s this ?‘ She replied,
‘That was Richard J. Sterling‘. He asked, ‘ Why
is he
here ? ’With a tear in her eye she replied,
‘Because he learnt how to LOVE,…‘
The woman’s name was Cindy,… The sister of the
late and Greatest Richard J. Sterling. That day as she
beheld the stature of her recently departed brother,
she realized that she had taught Richard the greatest
lesson ever known. And as she thought about this, she
quietly whispered it to herself,
‘
LOVE ‘
The
Master KEY
The Greatest thing
you'll ever learn, is to Love
and be Loved in return
Moulin
Rouge Movie
How true it is that the greatest thing we can ever do
is to Love. Yet if we honestly look at our lives, can
we truly say that this is what motivates us ? It is
very interesting for us to notice that very often our
theories and our actions don’t tie up. So often we
believe the right things, but don’t do them.
So what is the Master KEY to this greatness ? What is
the way that anyone can follow to the highest or most
Noble Path ?
Surprisingly the answer is actually very simple. In
fact it is so simple that even when we hear it, we
struggle to believe that the great key to all the
riches of life could be so simple.
In our story Richard, was the epitome of all of our
societies ideals, rich, famous, influential and he
owned a Porsche. But we also see that ultimately it
wasn’t his wealth that brought him greatness and
true-happiness.
If we take a little time to discover what it is that
drives us, we will often find that the majority of us
are either driven by Fear or Lust.
Fear is when we are
forced to do something, because we are afraid of what
will happen if we don’t do it. This fear can come
from an outside source such as an employer or it could
come from ourselves.
Many
times we use fear instead of Wisdom to protect us
…
And in doing this we sacrifice the freedom and
naturalness of life and end-up in an emotional prison.
Fear
robs us of our ability to live and be and be free
At other times we are motivated by lust. We feel that
we just have to do it. Another way of describing lust
is to say, that it is the feeling of wanting more of
something, even though logically we actually have
enough. So we eat a whole chocolate cake, even though
a single slice, would more than satisfy our little
craving for sweet things.
The biggest problem with lust is just that, lust
never ever has a point where there is enough. It
always wants more and is never satisfied. Lust can be
a little tricky, because…
The
thing we lust after, is often not the actual thing we have a
unsatisfiable
craving for
So
in Richard’s case his craving was for ‘Self Worth’.
He believed he would only be worth something if he was loaded
with money. But even when he had the money, he
still never felt satisfied,... because he was using
the wrong 'thing' to meet his need.
To use a silly example, trying to feel ‘Self
Worth’ with money, is like trying put out a fire with
carrots. It just makes no sense. What Richard
discovered was that his sense of ‘Self Worth’
ultimately came from what he thought about himself. If
he thought that he was valuable then,… he was, if he
thought he wasn’t valuable,… then he wasn’t. He
had the power to decide and when he learnt how to Love
himself,…He discovered that Loving yourself means
thinking highly of yourself.
It
means considering yourself to be valuable and
precious, it means caring about and cherishing the
amazing you. Yes you, you are amazing,… and as you
ponder this thought for a moment,… Remember, that one
can Love themselves and still be humble.
Humility
isn’t thinking less of yourself; it is realizing
that all people, including you are like blue
diamonds.
Amazingly rare and
exceptionally valuable,…
… But even though we are all uniquely valuable, we
are valued at the same price.
Let’s think about how we too can learn to Love. And
more importantly how we can Love ourselves as a first
step.
… And that love can’t be earned. We need to think
about ourselves as a great parent protecting,
nurturing and developing their child. Many of us never
had perfect parents, but that doesn’t stop us from
learning how to be perfect parents to ourselves.
If
we really think about just what it is that makes Love,
'Love'. We will realize that we feel most Loved when we
are being Supported in our endeavors, Nurtured and
corrected in our life's path and Provided for when we
have a sincere need. We will often find that, at the
times we felt most unloved, we felt a lack
of one of these three things. We felt that our
parents, or spouses or friends, or boss didn't support
us, or believe in us, or nurture us, or provide for us.
We therefore felt unloved.
But
herein lies a great secret. Because if we know what we
need to feel, in order to feel truly loved, then we
can start by supporting, nurturing and providing for ourselves. And as we
do, we will feel Loved by ourselves. And as we
truly feel loved by ourselves, we will feel empowered
to love others. And as we love others, they will in
turn love us.
So
what we would do is to practice supporting ourselves
and believing in ourselves. To be the first one to 'cheer us' on. To motivate and inspire ourselves and to
believe that we have something greater within
us.
We
can be the first person to Nurture ourselves. To dress
our wounds. To provide a gentle word of comfort if
things go wrong. We can advice ourselves, and help ourselves to grow
our weaknesses,
into strengths.
We
can provide for ourselves. We can learn how to make a fine
income, we can educate ourselves, we can become
wiser, learn to get along with our brothers and learn
how to improve and develop to a higher level of
excellence.
All
of these actions summarize Self-Love. And when we
practice them, we will truly feel loved by ourselves.
And
as we master them within ourselves, we will be able to
master them with others. We will truly understand how
to Support, Nurture and Provide for our families, our
friends and the greater world out there. And our love
will beget more love than we have ever imagined
possible, because
...
The basic idea is to get ourselves to do things by motivation
and inspiration, by using
passion (I love to do this!), and not Fear/Lust (I
have to do this),
to move ourselves to action.
So what we do is we first start
with the small things. We ask our ‘Me’ to give us
a signal every time we feel a certain emotion, say
anger. Maybe ‘Me’ can say ‘STOP!’. We then ask
‘Me’ to replace that feeling of anger with,…
Love, Calm and Sound Judgment. So we will Feel
Caring, Level Headedness and have a Clear Mind for
making the right decision and doing the right thing.
The
feeling of love will replace, anger or jealousy or
lust or fear or whatever feeling there may be, with warm,
caring, kind, supporting, nurturing and
providing feelings.
And
as we do this, we will automatically find that other
people will tend to respond to us in a different way. Even rough and uncaring
people will find these types of feelings, and the actions
they cause, hard to
resist.
So as you ponder and wonder about all of these
things, and think about what one significant thing, you
can learn from all of this, you can remember the great
secret, of the Greatest of the Great, and begin to
live in the now and the ‘morrow the feeling of,…
